Condensed version published in "The Light Connection" October 2002.
CORE GROUPS
Beyond Therapy -- Beyond Ordinary Life
A New Direction for Community
By Jane Ilene Cohen
Core Groups, are a model for developing meaningful relationships, as well as an essential foundation for developing community. They are a breakthrough in our concept of meaningful and satisfying life experience. Beyond a therapeutic experience, this is your real life in the present moment, with those you're already connected with. These groups can be set up for either a circle of friends or for members of a community.
Communities are generally started on the basis of common values, ideas, projects, or visions. But when its members actually come together to try to make it work, they run into the obvious fact that at the core of any community is relationship. Creating community based on common goals is going about building community backwards.
First must be a coming together of friends, who like and love each other, and want to connect on a deeper level, based on what they most want in relation to each other. A real and deepening coming together on a personal level is necessary first, in order to discover where there is energetic alignment and alignment of purpose.
Core Groups, are set up for 5-6 participants (or 3 couples) per group, as the basic structure, but can be set up in different configurations, according to what is needed. The process is an experiential exploration, under the surface of polite interaction and what feels safe and familiar, to what's really going on at deeper levels, releasing the incredible potential of what's possible between each other.
The power of the living material that comes up between people is enormous, with vast possibilities. People are generally afraid to go beyond known and accepted ways of relating to each other, based on roles that keep the relating within certain structures. Getting under these roles to the living material in the present moment is where the full force of the energy of life is. Jane facilitates bringing this material to the surface in a safe framework, allowing that energy to be released in a productive, positive and transforming way. That brings participants into the zone of the here-and-now, where what they all want on the deepest levels begins to emerge and connect, and possibilities start forming, as each person brings in his or her unique contribution of reality. This creates an energy field, a vortex, an energetic connection to a source beyond ordinary human experience.
From the perspective of community: It is this process of delving deeper and deeper into the shared here-and-now, based on what we most want in the living moment, that gives the living, evolving organism of community, foundation and integrity on an on-going basis. It is from that place that actual vision, contribution and creation, in alignment with this particular group, starts emerging. From this process, the physical manifestations of community can then evolve, if that is what is in alignment for that particular group.
This process must be based on enlightened self-interest (what one most desires on a very individual and personal level), because that is how the reality of the here-and-now is accessed. It is the only point of honesty and congruency.
The main focus is on what you most desire, with those you most desire it with -- and on evolving that as an on-going process, getting more and more in touch with what really would be nourishing, satisfying and meaningful to you. It is not focused on what is dysfunctional; but when dysfunctional material comes up, it needs to be addressed.
Blocks that hold back the live material and cause it to come out in non-productive ways (preventing communication, connection and love), are caused by unhealed emotional issues (limiting decisions). Jane brings these blocks out into the open, so they can be seen as they really are. The group process creates a fluid state where your perception of reality is not fixed in the old dysfunctional structure. This allows something not experienced before to come into consciousness, and re-form your way of experiencing reality, in a much more positive and empowered way.
In addition, individual private sessions with Jane can be scheduled. These sessions work very powerfully in combination with the groups. They are rapid and deep, clearing specific limiting decisions that emerge in the groups. As each group member clears specific issues that come up, it raises the consciousness and level of participation for the whole group.
In the context of here-and-now experience, each Core Group explores the areas of life most meaningful to its members, opening avenues of growth, expression and empowerment unique to that group.
Examples of possible areas to explore:
1. How can you and your significant relationship(s) come together in ongoing intimate connection, without sacrificing any aspect of who you are and what you most desire?"
2. Exploring, uncovering, and opening up the dynamics between male and female, increasing understanding, communication and empowerment.
3. Monogamy vs. other forms of relationship agreements
4. Self-interest vs. selfishness
5. Non-role relationships
6. Victim and victimizer issues
The Core Group has the potential for building a more meaningful and empowered foundation for your life, based on the unique reality you came into this lifetime with. It opens up a new kind of community, based on who you actually are, in relation to who each other is, and what you want, and what is true between you -- as you uncover deeper and deeper levels of what that is.
To participate in this process, contact Jane for further information (fee, location, etc.). Feel free to consult with her about how this would apply or relate to your (actual or potential) community or circle of friends. These are set up as weekly, ongoing groups with he committed participation in 4-week segments.
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CORE GROUPS
Bringing In A New Paradigm
By Jane Ilene Cohen © Copyright 9/22/02
Core Groups (described in "CORE GROUPS: Beyond Therapy --Beyond Ordinary Life, A New Direction for Community") embody an essential new paradigm." Fundamental to this paradigm is a shift in our relationship with what we want and desire. Most of us were brought up with the concept that living from a foundation of our own desires is at the expense of others and is inherently selfish, and that what we really want is at odds with what others want. Therefore, we will cause conflict, deprive others, and make the world worse if we create our life from that orientation. We therefore believe we should orient our lives around the needs of others, rather than our own desires. This is actually an impossibility at a very fundamental level, for life itself.
The old paradigm is so ingrained, at such an unconscious level in the global consciousness, that we don't even realize what we are doing. It has distorted our whole survival system. Having suppressed our real desires, we create a defense system in which we appear to have an acceptable affect on others, while, at the same time, manipulating underground to get what we think we need and want. We collectively participate in this mass manipulation in order to get what we substitute for getting our needs filled, because we feel we can't give legitimacy to living a life that is the expression of what we (personally and individually) desire. It's what we do as a consequence of blocking our desires that is the problem, not the desires themselves. As a result of how we have distorted ourselves, it is a great achievement to even know what we really want.
If we know what we want and what we want is to be happy, then we will not be likely to go along with what doesn't make us happy. Dysfunctional dynamics don't make anyone happy or satisfied, and therefore, if we are in contact with what we really want, we will be aware of, and not support or agree to keep hidden, dysfunctional dynamics in the world around us. This could rock the boat of our environment in a large way. That is why it is so common for parents to use whatever means are at their disposal to control their children and try to mold them according to what makes them (the parents) feel comfortable in their set ways.
The new paradigm shift requires an understanding that real contribution comes from enlightened self-interest (what one most desires on a personal and individual level), not from sacrifice or orienting our lives around our perception of the world's needs. It is not necessary, nor functional, for any of us to attempt to create something from our perception of what other people need. That is a perspective with no foundation in actual here-and-now personal experience. Our personal desires are the only place reality can be connected with, and is an ongoing process. Coming from our desires puts us in a place of clarity, honesty and congruency, and is the only place of integrity from which we can connect with others. The reason children are generally so direct and to the point is they haven't yet learned to suppress their desires.
Suppressing our desires makes us very subject to manipulation, because we are not on the solid ground of our actual experience. The social structures we have created depend on people not being on this solid ground, and hold in place social taboos that reinforce this. These taboos are generally against behaviors that don't conform to what is considered polite, "polite" being behavior that doesn't disrupt other people's defense systems.
Our desires come out against others only when they have been blocked or distorted. In their undistorted form they are in alignment with the universe, as they are facets of universal expression and help shape All That Is. Rather than detract from any part of the universe, they enrich it because desire is an integral part of the process of creation.
The issue, therefore, is not that orienting our life around our own desires is harmful or indulgent; it is that doing this frees us from orienting our lives around what makes other people feel comfortable in their defense systems.
When we create and live a life fully oriented around what we truly desire, we release and express the powerful, live energy of who we are, which has a huge impact on the world around us. This can bust through defense systems and old paradigms that have no foundation in reality. The power and effect of releasing this energy is enormous, and perhaps humanity hasn't been ready until this time to approach letting it out. It means releasing the control humanity has put so much effort and investment into maintaining, which holds in place our limited, negative, and distorted perception of reality -- and allowing the power of what is true to emerge, interact and transform experience. This has the potential of fundamentally transforming humanity's experience of reality.
Each person has that potential effect on the world (and universe), as they step into the power of expressing their unique experience of reality. When this power is brought together and focused in the energy vortex of a group, the effect is even more powerful. But in order for that powerful effect to occur, there must be alignment of energy and purpose. It must be based on what is truly aligned with the enlightened self-interest of each participant. This is a powerful safeguard, because it is connected to the pure stream of desire, which is connected to the essence of who each person is. You can't get to this depth of experience and congruency unless it is connected to a larger source and perspective beyond the limited human physical experience.
The Core Groups shift the focus of purpose from outward directed (oriented toward the needs of others), to focusing on what participants most desire on a very individual and personal level (enlightened self-interest).
In these groups, Jane facilitates people in getting connected to the magnificent uniqueness of who they are and what matters most to them, on an ever deepening and evolving level. The process opens up the unique paradigm (experience of reality) each person is bringing in and supports it into the fullest expression that the participants are ready for. Depending on the intention of each specific group, the focus can be anywhere from the personal, individual expression of a circle of friends, impacting mainly themselves -- to a larger energetic field of influence (of, perhaps, community), which has its impact on a more global playing field, allowing a fuller power of creation to express itself.
As each person becomes connected to the unique magnificence they are and what most matters to them, the expression of that is an incredible contribution to the world and universe, no matter what form it takes. It is them living and creating from the expression of their being.
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